This is Amelia. Amelia Satterthwaite Ward. I have been incredibly remiss in not announcing her existence earlier.

Amelia is a brand new person who is not exactly “owned” by my friends Greg and Lisa but who will probably feel that way in about 14 or 15 years. She’ll certainly have some kind of issue with that middle name until she’s in her 30s and can appreciate her parents and the history that name represents. (What is the story of Satterthwaite, anyway, you two?)

I have known Greg since 7th grade. He is one of those people whom, while I do not communicate with him all that often, I consider one of my very best friends. When I mentioned staying up until dawn “playing Halo 2 on the Xbox or talking religion with people I’ve known since junior high,” Greg is one of the guys I was talking about. I usually only get to see him when we’re both visiting Colorado. (See exhibits A and G. Exhibits B through F removed for lack of relevance.)

Thankfully, Greg married an awesome person who I have loved getting to know bit by bit over the years. She and he both live in Atlanta now, something which I think they both are so very way over.

Now, Greg and Lisa have joined the burgeoning tide of people having babies. While one part of my brain can not believe Greg has a kid now, the other part knows this girl is in for the time of her life. She is bound to grow up enjoying the nuances of Mountain Dew, will always recycle the can it comes in, and will certainly have a future kicking my ass at Halo 5.

This is my public, hearty congrats to Greg and Lisa—and Amelia, too. I can not wait to see all you guys at Christmas. I hope my advancing age and bad back are capable of providing the kind of child-friendly entertainment I’m known for once Amelia gets old enough to appreciate it.

I was gonna try to not post something today, but I had to put up a link to this: Katazukue: The Tidy Table.

It’s a table that, at random times, clears itself. All your stuff ends up on the floor. This is funny. Be sure to watch the video as well.

The artist’s name is Crispin Jones, a name that lends itself perfectly to this kind of amusing art. Poke around some more on the site, and you’ll find some cool stuff, like the rising building in Energy Shutdown, and the “psychic” desk in An Invisible Force. Fun stuff!

I know, I know… I’ve been a posting powerhouse this week. I hate pushing one doubtfully-interesting post down the page for the next. But I had to give all y’all some links for the newest developments on the intelligent design front.

First up, the Kansas Board of Education has voted in favor of adding anti-evolution/pro-intelligent design teachings to science classes. The kicker is that they have actually re-defined science to get this to be legal. Can this be any scarier? On the plus side, voters ousted all 8 of the incumbent candidates for the school board in Dover, Pennsylvania, who voted to allow intelligent design to be taught in their schools.

For your reading pleasure, here are articles from NewScientist and The New York Times.

For an interesting summary with some great links, check out an article in, of all places, Ars Technica. One of the interesting things this article mentions is the Catholic Church’s support of evolution. Interesting!

In reaction to the impending Kansas decision, the National Academy of Sciences and the National Science Teachers Association used copyright law as a weapon, keeping science education standards manuals out of the hands of Kansas schools. On the surface, it sounds like a great tactic, but Jennifer Granick at Wired has a wonderful argument against it.

Of course, we’ve already had lively discussion here on The Wren Forum. Read “Intelligent Bullshit” (and the infamous “dickhead” comment that caused great strife) and “Evolution NOW!”

See what happens when you mix both religion and politics? Well, amidst all the drama, it’s good to know that the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is still a viable option for crackpot metaphysical junkies, ex-Catholics included.

Thanks (morbidly) to Darren yet again.

While I am loath to post such a morbid link after the fun of the chocolate post, I have to proliferate this article from Daily Kos (a site I really should read regularly).

Iraq is an unnessecary war. Wars bring unspeakably horrific deaths to innocent people. The U.S., as the instigator of this war, is the cause of bringing these wartime atrocities to Iraq in the name of “freedom.” Is it better to have your child’s skin melted off in the name of freedom, or in the hands of Saddam? You might answer, “Freedom.” But when the “freedom” is as bad as the forced subservience, when the “freedom” was forced upon you by a nasty, violent conflict by an uncaring, egotistic superpower (yes, that’d be us), what’s the difference?

Really, the more that comes to light, the more George and all his merry band of evildoers make me physically ill.

Read the story. But be warned, it’s not pleasant.

This is a box of chocolate. It is from Marcy, who must know me too well. See, I’ve been into dark chocolates this last year, going ga-ga over Scharffen Berger in particular. This little set, from “flavor virtuoso and … magician of senses” Pierre Marcolini, provides small tiles of 75% cocoa “derived from a pure origin.” Cocoa from Venezuela, Madagascar, Ghana, and other realms of intrigue are presented, and I can tell you that there is a difference between them all.

In fact, the enclosed card describes the different chocolates in terms a sommelier would appreciate:

Java: Spicy, peppered fragrance, slightly fruity.

Trinidad: Intense flavor with walnut and vanilla, sharp cocoa sensation, long lasting aroma.

Chuao: Little bitter with nice pronouncement, good aroma with hint of hazelnuts and olives.

And so on.

I always thought that I’d really get into the whole wine thing if wine didn’t taste so nasty. And if I drank. Well, I’ve found my substitute! Thanks, Marcy!

It seems the short film David and I made (yes, Food Code), was referenced in a 2004 review of the original movie, Timecode. The problem is that the review is in Spanish.

Putting it through the trusty Google translator, you get this:

Despues de Timecode, Mike Figgis remained with the desire to make another “brilliant analysis” of its own universe and I make Hotel (2001) an extension of Timecode, about madness to make a film of high budget and what all the equipment of production must support, presenting/displaying a documentary one to us of the tape that is being made. The concept presented/displayed in Timecode already quickly was copied in several cases: in the series of television 24, in a cortometraje that tried to parodiar it call Food Code (Steven Lekowicz and David Melito 2000) or a video of the group of Mexican rock Arizona.

I can not tell for sure, but it seems we’re being dissed. Are we being dissed? Are they dissing us? They’re dissing us.

Well, if anyone speaks Spanish and can properly translate, I’d love to know so I can be properly insulted.

It’s that time again… Time for me to point out some of the fine newer features of The Wren Forum. If you have any thoughts on them, good or bad, leave a comment here!

Latest Musings! That handy list in the sidebar will take you to the most recent posts. That’s more handy than a Swiss Army knife!

Categories! I have painstakingly added category tags to all past Wren Forum posts. Now, just by clicking a link in the Categories box in the sidebar, you can view all posts listed in a certain category. Or if you’re as lazy as I am, subscribe to the RSS feed for that category so you won’t miss a single one of my Bush rants! (I was hoping for a drop-down list to keep the Categories box small, but no good code or plug-ins are available. If I ever find one, this will change.)

Search Posts AND Comments! I found a plug-in that will search comments as well as posts. It takes longer, but I feel it’s worth it. Don’t you?

Live Comment Preview! This has been up for a while, but I had to point it out. The little line break glitch aside, this will be very handy for previewing any HTML you add for links or text formatting. And despite fears, this is not live on the site itself until you post it.

Spell Check Comments! Why should posters have all the fun? (A question asked by many a banner, postcard, and leaflet.) Now anyone submitting a comment can see just how atrocious their spelling really is.

Spam Security! Behind the scenes, I have already been receiving lots of comment spam. Luckily, it is caught before appearing on the site, but to make sure it never gets to my approval box in the first place, I have added a code thingy. Sadly, it’s one more step to contend with, but on the plus side, if I find it works well, I will get rid of the comment moderation so comments will be posted immediately in the future.

Now with Stain Fighters! Spill your Coke and Ragú all you want. The Wren Forum is moisture-resistant and colorfast!

I am generally a square kinda guy. I do not drink or smoke or do drugs. I don’t go to bars very often. I don’t sleep around. If I’m up ’til dawn, it’s usually because I’ve been playing Halo 2 on the Xbox or talking religion with people I’ve known since junior high.

But if you visit Daren’s blog (yes, he’s been busy today, as every day), you’ll get an interesting snippet of the birthday party I was at this Saturday. Yes, I was at that party. And I was not the one scrunched in the corner of the sofa, smiling shyly and nursing my fifteenth glass of water. It turns out I was the guy who went party hopping with people I’d just met, and suggested the Truth or Dare game that got someone to sit on my lap for an enticing moment while I guzzled my twenty-first glass of water.

There was a lot going on that night, much of it amusing, most of it unrequited, and all of it refreshingly out of the norm for me. When I finally got home after the party, took a semi-drunken phone call at 5:30am, then slid into bed, it was light outside. Unlike the usual nights where I sleep fitfully and rise several times to grumpily go to the bathroom, I did not open my eyes until 5:00pm the next day (or, I guess technically, that same day).

And so you see, so much for Sunday.

To those who might find my participation in such a scandalous night of debauchery surprising, I can assure you there was no scandal (almost) and no debauchery (nearly none) involved. It was simply a night that went long and loud. And besides, if this was the way my life was lived normally, I wouldn’t have appreciated Saturday as much as I did.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have an episode of Hidden Frontier to watch on my video iPod.

(Photo courtesy Darren and, I assume, Lum. Without their immediate knowledge.)

Ah, The Daily Show! Bastion of sanity through humor!

See how gay marriage has adversely affected Massachusetts in this hard-hitting news report.

NOTE: Movie link now goes to my site, since this crooksandliars.com place was messing up my link. (There goes my bandwidth!)

Thanks to Darren for this one.

An image from an important ConocoPhillips Pipe Line Company brochure I received in the mail Saturday:

We can all thank companies like ConocoPhillips for making our world a safer place in which to live!

I have never liked Friendster very much. I don’t know why. Something about the design of the site, the way it works… being pressured to write nice things about people ( )…

About a week ago, I got an e-mail from a friend who is already linked to my profile in Friendster. It was a “reminder” of his inviting me to join. Huh. I ignored it, of course.

So half an hour ago, Ken here at work asked me about Friendster and if he should join. He was asking because it seems I had sent an e-mail asking him to join. I never had, of course. Then I read an e-mail sent to me from someone else, saying he didn’t remember the first invite, but had gone ahead and joined thanks to this “reminder.”

The e-mails legitimately take people to Friendster to sign up. Or so I have been able to determine without creating a whole new account.

How did these e-mails get sent? Most importantly, how did my friends’ e-mail addresses get harvested?

I have to blame my PC. I only ever go to Friendster on my PC at work, since that’s the e-mail it uses to helpfully remind me that I haven’t visited in months. I have to suppose some kind of e-mail from them or appearing to be from them installed something on my PC that was able to cull my addresses and use that to send out the spam.

I sent them a nasty note asking what the hell was going on.

I hate Friendster. You can tell because I’m not even putting a hyperlink to them in this rant.

First off, congrats to John for figuring out how to post a picture. And a cool one, at that.

Now, time for some links for your pleasure and fun! And because you have nothing better to do today.

It is so rare for someone to admit they do something unpleasant and yucky. It’s also rare for someone to be so logical about something that people generally feel so stringly about. Je am talking about smoking, and though I would love nothing more than to see the tobacco companies be shot through the head—a decidedly reactionary and cruel stance—I have to agree wholeheartedly with Robb’s latest treatise.

Speaking of nefarious plots, how about that RFID in our passports thang? How about it, indeed! Wired has a good article called “Fatal Flaw Weakens RFID Passports.”

Speaking of speaking of nefarious plots, did you know Sony, in their latest stupid bid to prevent music piracy, has placed a little trojan horse program on audio CDs that install themselves on your PC (Windows only, of course) and can then be used by third parties to hide any file from the system and perhaps do truly disastrous damage? No? Well, Wired to the rescue again! Read “The Cover-Up Is the Crime.”

Off of the speaking of speaking ofs, I enjoy this little item regarding Microsoft’s not-so-hot presentation design. This is what I do for a living, these presentations, and have to agree that Steve Jobs does beautiful if spare presentations, while Microsoft, like everything else it does, gums up the works.

That is all. FOR NOW…

So, here’s one of the many reasons I haven’t had much time to post things lately.

This makes me sick. I heard about it yesterday on the radio, then ran into it again on Darren’s site (link below). I thought I’d provide some links so others can get just as disgusted.

Links to what? Links describing how Dick, our V.P., is trying to get language passed in Congress that will exempt the CIA from human rights laws. It would allow the CIA to torture foreign prisoners we are holding overseas.

Could this be a liberal smear campaign? Nope. This is for real.

Here’s the story in the New York Times.

Here’s the story from the UPI.

Here’s the story in The Boston Globe.

Here’s the story in The Washington Post, along with an editorial. (The editorial is also reprinted at Darren’s site, with his usual graphical flare).

Here’s an audio archive from NPR’s Talk of the Nation. (I have not listened to this yet.)

When we read these kinds of stories about our government, we have to remember who it was who put them into power. I am disgusted with our ignorant fellow Americans.