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Well, I’m very disappointed in Ben Stein. No longer will I be able to watch Ferris Bueller’s Day Off and think of Ben as the funny teacher. I will think of him as the pathetic mouthpiece of ID who, despite himself, must have accidentally been funny.

What the hell am I talking about? This:

Wow. There is so much that’s horrible about that clip, I can’t even see straight. O’Reilly really is an ignorant, posturing creep. It makes me sad that so many people hang on this man’s every word. And that Ben! What? He always presented such a fun yet rational image!

Okay, it’s not very fair to bludgeon Ben and his talents because he believes in God, but he really is asking for it. Perhaps I’m persecuting him for his beliefs, as he says “the seculars” do! Well, no. I’m not persecuting him for that, I’m persecuting him for his ignorance on the matters he’s trying to discuss. If you’re going to summarize the “secular” viewpoint of the beginning of life on Earth as “lighting striking a mud puddle,” then you are open game. Trying to sell the ID agenda as a simple first amendment right to free speech is full-on bullshit.

I got into all this again thanks to a very good Ars Technica article describing how, after a defeat in the courts, Intelligent Design is rebranding itself to take another shot at infiltrating schools. Ben mentioned in the above clip how desperate “seculars” are because Darwin’s theory is so flawed. “Seculars” aren’t the ones who are desperate, it’s the creationists who are desperate. Science doesn’t need to throw up a smokescreen to get taught in classes. Only fake, made-up ideologies reliant on ancient superstitions and human failings need to do so to be considered as proper curricula for schools.

While certain slimy types keep wanting to force ID into everyone’s consciousness, it’s good to keep finding articles like this one, which demonstrate how, little-by-little, humans can piece together the true evolution of life and the workings of the universe. There are no little pieces like this to support the concept of a creator, and I think, Mr. Stein, that that is what is making ID lovers nervous. All science needs to do is explore, finding clues and proof about the real world, while ID must rely on attacks, whining that science hasn’t discovered all the answers yet. Somehow, ID folks feel religion has, which is ludicrous.

What I find amusing (in a very scary way) is how Ben says evolution was a “brilliant proposition,” but faults it for not describing how life began in the first place. Gee golly gee! I wonder if perhaps Ben expects the theory of relativity to explain how H. G. Wells came up with the idea for his novels? This is a perfect example of propaganda. All you need to do is distort the facts enough, make up false doubts, and you’re on your way to a successful undermining of truth.

May I finally point out, Ben, that while you deride Darwin’s evolutionary theory as being out of date (“[it] was a brilliant theory in the middle on the 19th century… it’s the 21st century, there are a lot of questions…”), the concept of a creator is even more out of date and even more full of questions. Nice try. “Stein? Stein? Stein?”

Happy Friday! Here’s something incredibly amusing to send you off into the wild, wild west of the weekend.

I’ve been busy, thanks for asking! In fact, I just got back from Paris, where I worked three maddening shows, got some kind of food poisoning, and then shunted it all away to the “who cares?” trough with a few fun days roaming the city proper.

But now I’m back. And to prove it, here’s a fun anti-Microsoft video. ENJOY!

Here are some things I’ve been looking at to make today’s installation of Windows on two Macs bearable.

(Via FSJ)

Button for Bacon

(Via Hi-ReS! Feed)

WTF Mac Store by Jeff Carlson

(Via Daring Fireball; photo by Jeff Carlson)

In Case You Have No Style

(Also via Daring Fireball; click picture for larger view)

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Yes, I got this reading FSJ’s blog.

Permalink Comments Off on Oh, God, This Guy’s a Steve?Comments Off on Oh, God, This Guy’s a Steve? By

I am so very embarrassed to share this guy’s name. I’m sure we’ve all seen this clip before, but it’s worth revisiting.

Look at this man! He’s a nutjob! Look at those scary, crazy eyes! That tilted-head look is what I’d expect my own eyes to see right before an ice pick is rammed into my heart by a woods-dwelling maniac.

Steve Ballmer, a woods-dwelling maniac. Seems about right.

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I’m feverishly trying to finish Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows before someone in the lunch line lets loose with the ending. I want to avoid the embarrassment that the trial for manslaughter would bring. I also, of course, must avoid any mention of the book in the media. This requires distraction.

YouTube is synonymous with distraction. For instance:

Now, I love Timothy Dalton. I guess I love Mae West, if just for her legend status, as I have not seen much of her on the screen. I do not love… this. This preposterous “duet.” Timothy can’t sing, and Mae just says her words in her Mae way. Good heavens.

Next, take this fellow:

No, really, take him. Please.

Ba-dump BUMP!

I must concur that “manualism” is an actual talent. See, for instance, the amazing Handini.

The fun part of YouTube is simply following links from one video to the next. Handini has the following subscriber to his videos: Black Hercules DC. Since embedding of his videos is disabled, may I suggest you check out A Tribute to America, Part 3. A tribute to America, indeed! If by “tribute” you mean “swaying sack of manhood.”

Maybe a better distraction to all this video watching would be to start my own Faceball league.

Or maybe I just need to finish the damn book.

(Thanks to Sven and Fuz for sending those first two links.)

Most things that have 2 million hits on YouTube have to do with farts and poo-poos. But this is really something to watch.

I only have to wonder: What part of New Jersey was this?

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I’ve been meaning to post my thoughts on this week’s D conference, at which Mr. Gates introduced the Surface interactive table thingy, where Mr. Hawkins introduced the Palm Folēo [NOTE: this link is now dead, as is the Folēo.], and Mr. Jobs made Apple’s stock fly up dozens of dollars just by attending. But I got a little sidetracked. Sorry.

In the meantime, however, here is a hilarious bit from the funny Mr. Colbert. I agree with him 100% on the chocolate cake thing, by the way. How could I not? (Sorry about the ad in the video.)

(Notice how Microsoft’s Surface site doesn’t work quite right in Safari. Typical.)

Permalink Comments Off on “These Days, Male or Female, United Just Loathes You All.”Comments Off on “These Days, Male or Female, United Just Loathes You All.” By

How good of United Airlines to notice that women are… different from men.

Funny how a forward-thinking ad from the ’60s can seem so absolutely inappropriate today. Which makes what I’m about to say absolutely inappropriate: I’d hate to be on the wrong end of that woman’s happy meter. I imagine Miranda Priestly has nothing on this chick. Cardinali? Is that her name? Well, I guess when you’re as stylish and weathy as Cardinali, you can afford to bathe in vats of bitchitude.

Oh, and the YouTube comments on this video? Ridiculous. Why are 95% of the comments on YouTube absolutely moronic? Maybe it’s time to kick the trash off the Internet!

This is quite priceless:

Once again, I’m sure I’m really late coming to the party on this one, but here’s a fun skit from MadTV. It mixes two things I love: Apple and Bitching About Our Stupid President.


Well, this is pretty amusing:

I couldn’t tell if this was oldish, or newish, or what. But then that new Kodak logo comes up at the end… Huh! Guess Kodak has a new logo! This must have been a CES video.

Permalink Comments Off on The Other Steve: A Study in DummyComments Off on The Other Steve: A Study in Dummy By

Oh, Steve Balmer! I know you have to say these things, but do you have to say them like a goober? It just means when Apple kicks your ass in the phone market, you’ll have one more overly-cocky, dumbass remark to attach to your Marley chain. (And what I hear from Windows Mobile users is that Windows Mobile sucks… Sure, the Q you mentioned does the things you said it does, but it does them poorly, which was the entire theme of Steve Jobs’ iPhone announce.)

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I’m back in L.A., back at work, and back at whatever. Until I have some time to write down my summary of the trip and post pics in the gallery, I’m going to once again rely on the lazy man’s version of a blog posting: YouTube! Herewith, another peculiar Japanese video. Enjoy!

I wonder (among many, many other things) at the chubby American’s interesting headdress. Something has gone awry. While the henchman has obviously read the Ne’er-do-Well’s Handbook of Handkerchief Disguisery, there appears to have been no time in this hurried stickup plot for him to disseminate the information higher up the chain of command.

Thanks to Sven for forwarding this one.

Thanks to an apostrophe in the subject line, this did not get posted yesterday, as I’d intended. Ah, PHP! But now that I’m back home, here it is:

High over the coastline

Here is the view from Lorraine and Al’s condo in Boca. The blue ocean here makes one realize how dirty the ocean is in L.A.

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Laptop battery explosions have been all the rage with the trendsetters these days. Are you too untrendy to have had your laptop battery explode and catch fire? Then do watch the video below to see all the fun you’re missing.

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I’m late to the game on the Military Commissions Act of 2006, so instead of ranting myself, I’ll let the tack-sharp Keith Olbermann do it for me.

Thanks, again, to Alan for sending me this.

Yes, I LIVE! And though I have SO much to put up here, I am late getting to bed. What does that have to do with anything? I’m late because I’ve been up watching old Sesame Street stuff on YouTube. My God, could it have been a more brilliant show? Do enjoy these classic bits, before Elmo came and ruined everything.

The Mahna Mahna guy in the rhyming mood:

That is truly classically hilarious. I love how the blue guy gives that surprised double-take every time the purple guy comes in. And as a kid I always thought the first time the purple guy says “bread” was friggin’ hilarious. “BrrEEEAAd.”

Now, I had forgotten about the little bug Muppets until I saw this one:

This is not the one I remember, but it’s the only one I’ve seen on YouTube. The bug family that licks stamp glue together sticks together. HA HA HA!

This next one is weirder than I remember, thanks solely to the synthesizer soundtrack. But it still brings back a bazillion memories.

To this day, I often recall the singing orange when I see those big rubber bands around the office.

Then there were the Martians:

I’d like to find the grandfather clock one, too. Oh, wait, here it is:

Those are brilliant puppets!

Then, of course, was the musician who’d hit his head on the piano in frustration:

Sadly, all I see of the Mary Had a Little Bicycle one is this:

Oh, that’s rich! That banging the head on the keys! How many times did I recreate that when we got a piano in the house?

Now, if only I can find the chef who falls down the stairs with the messy desserts. I also re-staged that awesome scene over and over and over in our house, using pillows or Tupperware lids as “desserts.” They didn’t hurt when I’d crash into them falling down our stairway. If anyone finds the chef online, please pass the link(s) along!

Well, hope youve enjoyed this long-overdue post. I’ll put up some pics of Steve Jobs soon.

Permalink Comments Off on “…May This Country Forgive You.”Comments Off on “…May This Country Forgive You.” By

Actually, I don’t mind saying, “Mr. President, may this country tar and feather you and call you mean names.”

Or go to Crooks and Liars, which has a transcript, QuickTime, and WMV. Thanks to Alan for this.